Know your identity. NO anxiety.

The other day I watched a live session with Graham Cooke, an author and spiritual teacher from the UK.

I love everything Graham. His teachings changed the way I understood God, and after that everything changed.

Why did everything change after my understanding of God changed?

Because my understanding of myself changed too.

Now, my mission is the same: to change your understanding of God and yourself, based on who He is and what He’s done.

Let me explain.

A few years ago I had really bad depression and anxiety. It’s pretty common these days. (There’s a reason for that.)

It was debilitating.

I didn’t drive. I began regularly experiencing panic attacks. I had anxiety about every little thing—and I wasn’t on any medication for it. I considered treatment but didn’t have the money or support to seek it out.

So instead, I lived with it, if you can call it that.

Anxiety became a part of me, the norm; ever present and always to be expected.

It was the devil on my shoulder; and it never took a day off.

You could say I was tired.

I couldn’t do this because of my anxiety. I had a hard time with that because of my anxiety. This being things like going to the grocery store or a night out and that being medial tasks like calling a business to ask their hours or ordering food at a restaurant. Anxiety turns molehills into insurmountable mountains.

I spent many days unable to get out of bed, and the days I did manage it were plagued with heart papiltations and nervousness that makes your cheeks burn. Those who know, know. When you’re depressed, a task as simple as brushing your teeth becomes monumental.

I was hollow, yet somehow felt everything.

It’s hard to even write about: suddenly I’m reliving the feeling of my throat closing and my heart fluttering and like I’m going to die for no reason at all.

I couldn’t go out in public. I couldn’t talk to people. I thought everyone was judging me, looking at me, and had a problem with me. I couldn’t forgive myself or move on from my past.

That’s exactly what anxiety does. It makes it all about you. It tells you are what you feel. And I felt—terrible.

Anxiety insists you are what you do or what you’ve done. It convinces you that you’re nothing more than what you can produce, and reminds you that what you produce is never enough.

I can’t believe I used to “live” like that every. single. day.

I felt completely hopeless. I didn’t see a way out.

But then, something miraculous happened.

God renewed my mind.

“And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God.”

‭‭Romans‬ ‭12:2‬ ‭NKJV‬‬

The Lord changed the way I saw myself by calling me up to who I am in Him. I began to understand that God isn’t a condemning God. He is holy and therefore he must and does hate sin—but He loves US deeply. He sees us over our sin, and He’s had a plan to redeem us and save us since the beginning of time. He values our freedom and desires us to experience it’s truest form, the kind that cannot be found apart from Him.

He made me aware of His spirit within me and that I was more than a conqueror with Him on my side. He reminded me that I was never alone, that He was always with me and would never forsake me. He showed me that I am forgiven—not only that but I am a completely new creation, and all of the old has passed away and everything has been made new.

“that you put off, concerning your former conduct, the old man which grows corrupt according to the deceitful lusts, and be renewed in the spirit of your mind, and that you put on the new man which was created according to God, in true righteousness and holiness.”

Ephesians‬ ‭4:22-24‬ ‭NKJV‬‬

He helped me to start living from my true identity.

It didn’t happen in the way most people expect a miracle too—it wasn’t instant. But it was a miracle nonetheless. I am a completely different person now—whole and 100% healed, free from anxiety and depression!

God did it for me. He wants to do it for you, too. It is for freedom He sets us free. Now, He has commissioned me to preach the gospel (the good news) to you so that you may be healed and set free!

Your worth is not based on earthly things. It’s not based on anything you’ve done or what you can do. You are loved despite your deepest darkest downfalls—you are deeply treasured by a Father in heaven who made you. Once you let that truth soak in, your life will change.

A Man named Jesus came and changed up the whole game. He changed it all, y’all. We are no longer subjected to live under wrath from God but have been given every free gift from heaven. This has always been God’s plan in Christ Jesus.

This may be the first time you’re hearing any of this. Even if you grew up in church, there’s a good chance you’ve percieved judgement and not freedom. If so, I’m so sorry for what the spirit of religion did to you. It was done to me as well, but I’m free now and I know that spirit wasn’t God. I know the real Jesus. I know what the truth says, and the truth says there is no condemnation for those in Christ Jesus, who live by the Spirit and not by the flesh.

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It’s a lot simpler than you’re imagining.

Believe in the Lord Jesus and you will be saved.

A lot of us believe in the Lord for eternal salvation but fail to realize what salvation in Jesus means for us here and now.

You are free in Christ. You don’t have to live your life depressed, you don’t have try and escape your body any longer— you can trust in the Lord and be free from it all—simply by believing what He’s saying.

(Right when I wrote that the song in my store came on and said “if you’re thinking of the Holy Ghost” I WAS. Silly Holy Spirit loves to communicate in amazing ways!)

#1 Way to Partner with God in Renewing Your Mind

SPEAK His word over yourself. Yes, that means you have to get in the word of God. I know it’s the last thing you wanna do, but there’s a reason for that. There is LIFE in the word of the Lord; the enemy is trying to keep you away from LIFE.

One of the main ways the Lord renews your mind is through the reading, hearing, and studying of the word. Faith comes from hearing the word so get it in anyway you can.

At first you may have trouble understanding what you read. I know I did, that’s one of the reasons I didn’t read the bible in the first place. Ask the Lord for understanding and press on.

Do your research and find a translation that works for you. As you press in the Holy Spirit will give you understanding.

Seasoned believers: read your bibles!

Don’t fall victim to the curse of knowledge. No matter how much you’ve read you never stop needing daily bread. You wonder why you are so thirsty—go and drink!

I cannot express how important it is to stay in the word. God speaks through His word! If you want to hear what He’s saying you must read it! Start with the New Testament— I recommend the book of John. I find that I needed to understand what God did through Jesus and how it changed EVERYTHING before I was able to recieve Old Testament properly.

As you dive into the word, the Lord will write it on the tablet of your heart and your mind will be renewed day by day. You will physically feel different after you speak scripture over yourself. It may feel strange and you may get odd looks like I do if you do it in public, but I promise you things SHIFT when the word of the Lord is spoken.

Reach out to me— I’d love to walk with you on your journey to know Christ. In Him there is true peace and freedom from anxiety. In Him there is life!

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-M. Christian